Day 127

Well Donnie lost another legal battle, that makes it Trump= 0, Laws=3. I am tired of all this winning. Speaking of winning, Jared Kushner is winning the race to be the first Trumpiod to end up in jail. He is now the focus of the FBI investigation into Russian influence in the election. The Kush … More Day 127

Day 128

Donnie Long-Tie-Short-Digits is heading back to the US after a successful trip of confirming every American stereotype to the world. He said he is going to make his decision about the Paris Accord in a week or so. I’m sure he’ll do what he usually does, which is get away from someone and then insult … More Day 128

Day 129

Donnie “National Embarrassment, or MAGA” Trump is back on American soil and thinking about whether he will keep us in the Paris Climate Accord. His closest aides are saying he will have us pull out because the pull-out methodology is better than abstinence…where are all the pro-lifers when it comes to saving the people currently … More Day 129

Day 130

Paul “Ayn Rand” Ryan had a bad day yesterday when a group of middle school kids visiting Washington DC refused to have their picture taken with him. Kids can sense evil, so I totally understand why he couldn’t get within ten feet of them.  Donnie Orange Glow is going to have his tiny hands full … More Day 130

Day 131

President Trump made it through a speech without making it about himself, so I’m going to give him credit for sticking to the script while at Arlington. Now if he could do this for the next 1300 days, I’d be mildly happy.  French President Macron admitted to squashing Trump’s hand and then squashed Putin during … More Day 131

Day 132

The best part of waking up this morning was seeing “Covfefe” trending on Twitter. Trump was either summoning the evil spirit of Covfefe or fell asleep while tweeting. He was ranting about the fake news when he hit send and left an unusually indecipherable note. (Which is really saying something since the bar for indecipherable … More Day 132

Day 133

The day after the covfefe tweet, Sean Spicer had to humiliate himself again by claiming that Trump and a few other people knew what it meant. I’d feel bad for Spicer and his Faustian deal if I didn’t think I’d be seeing him for the next 20 years on Faux News continuing his lies.  Everyone … More Day 133

Day 134

Trump promised to pull out and he pulled out. “I’m the President of Pittsburgh not Paris.” Actually, you’re the President of the United States for a few more months and then you’ll be able to go back to your underwater home in Florida. (By the way, the mayor of Pittsburgh thinks you’re an idiot.) If … More Day 134

Day 135

Vlad Putin popped his shiny head out of the ground to say that the Russian hacking was done by patriots. I wonder if these are the same “patriots” who invaded Georgia and attacked a Baltic capital. If so, then patriots mean KGB. That’s as close to an admission as I need.  Pencil in Thursday as … More Day 135

Day 136

The good news about the Paris Accord is that the world is going to move on without us. I guess this is what it feels like to live in a second world country with a senile, orange dictator.  Trump did have a series of tweets about the London attacks right after the attacks happened which … More Day 136