Day 171

“Low Energy-Donnie-Needs a Nap” Trump appeared to doze off during a G20 roundtable meeting. This surprised no one because all the other leaders realize that the dumb kid at the table needs a little help. The British PM gave him a little nudge to wake the dozing Giant Baby Boy. 

After his meeting with Vlad the Election Impaler Putin, Trump said, “Vlad told me they did nothing. I agree. I won. Time to move on. Sad that people still want to find out the truth…oops did I say that? I need a nap.” 

Donald “I got all the Bad Genes…And there weren’t very many good ones to start with” Trump Jr. posted a video of his dad playing Maverick in Top Gun and shooting down a CNN plane. The only thing mildly funny about it was the idea that anyone would trust Trump behind the controls of a jet fighter. The guy can’t find his limo when he gets off Air Force One. How is he going to shoot down anything? Things Trump is good at destroying: Marriages, Casinos, America.

THE KUSH seems to have forgotten another meeting with a Russian. This one was with a Russian lawyer with Kremlin connections. This guy is the worst son-in-law since Pauly Shore. (Son in Law is an old movie kiddos. Rotten tomatoes rate it around 20%…that’s about what the American people are rating President Trump right now.) 

Oh, there was a KKK rally in Charlottesville yesterday. This happened while the sun was out. There were 50 morons carrying guns and wearing their pointy hats and momma’s sheets. This is the country we live in, where racist morons feel safe enough to crawl out of their trailer parks and bring their uncle-fathers and aunt-mothers to a daytime rally. The good news was that there were more counter protestors there…I don’t believe they carried guns, because guns don’t kill people, really stupid people with guns kill people. 

If I’m going to kill anything, it’s a souvlaki.

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