Day 168

The Orange Tan Man with Tiny Hands and Big Plans said today that nobody knows if Russia interfered with our election. Well, nobody if you exclude all the intelligence agencies in the US, the EU, and Russia. Then, yeah, nobody knows…

Trump doesn’t have time to deal with this Russian stuff anyway. North Korea is making it tough for Trump to keep another one of his broken campaign promises. “North Korea won’t do this when I’m president.” Yep, they are doubling down. It’s like the United States is on a bus in Seattle and two crazy people get on and start yelling at each other. We are all hoping they don’t get carried away and start fighting. Oh, there are some Trump supporters with their iPhones out hoping to record a fight and egging the crazies on. MAGA!

Speaking of MAGA, Japan and the EU signed a trade deal that will make up 30% of the global economy. Good thing our fearless leader is putting America first. This is the type of thinking that made the Mongrel Empire what it is today. 

In other business news, jobless rates moved up a touch, this usually doesn’t happen during the summer, but I’m sure it is all part of Trump’s master plan to get those coal mining jobs back. I’m hoping to get a job working on the steam engine production line. 

The Hobby Lobby is back in the news. This time they aren’t trying to save babies so they can refuse to give them healthcare. This time they’re funding ISIS. Yep, they’ve been buying artifacts from Iraq illegally. Those funds have been used to fund ISIS. So, next time you buy a bunch of scrapbooking stickers from Hobby Lobby, remember you’re funding terrorism. 

If you want to fund an organization that never harms anyone, you should be buying souvlaki from the Souvlaki Hut.

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