A couple days ago, Donnie Vienna Sausage Fingers praised Kim Jung-un for being a really, really smart leader. Yep, what can I say? Add Un to the list of crazy people Donnie likes. Somebody better tell him that Stalin and Hitler are dead or we might end up with another Frederick Douglass incident. On the government front, Donnie Big-Tie Little-Undies didn’t get funding for his beautiful wall. He said that the government needs a good shutdown because he keeps losing. Mike Pence told him that the government shut down valve was in the basement of the White House, so if you aren’t getting hot water in your White House shower this morning you now know why. 

Hillary appeared and blamed a bunch of people for her losing the presidency to an oversized, orange, ingrown toenail. 

The house voted to help the working class by eliminating overtime pay. Now the company you work for can use comp time to eliminate overtime pay. They also get to determine when that comp time is used…oh, nothing could go wrong with that. I hope you coal miners are enjoying the return of your jobs. You know where people work overtime for the love of the job? The Souvlaki Hut!