Day 230

As Hurricane Irma roars towards the hanging chad of Florida, the USA feels like we are being piloted by a drunken Ahab who had his brain bitten off and replaced with a chunk of ivory. Captain Agent Orange Julius Caesar Trumpster-Fire and Fuhrer-The Mango Madman-Von Trumplestillskin is at the helm of the USSMAGA and we … More Day 230

Day 231

Donnie-Fredo Trumpo Jr. didn’t get much sleep last night. He was up late practicing saying, “I don’t know that word you are using. Do you have the word’s origin? Is there another way of saying the word? Um…could you use it in a sentence? Okay, collusion. C O I L L U S I O … More Day 231

Day 232

The winning won’t stop. Here I am sitting at my computer getting tired of all the winning. Let’s chalk up one more win for the 9th Circuit Court. They just smashed Trumplestillskin’s travel ban…again. This time they said extended family members included far flung family members like aunts, uncles, and grandparents. I don’t know if … More Day 232

Day 233

Hurricane Irma is still moving toward Rush “I Like Blue Pills and I Cannot Lie” Limbaugh’s house. Irma is upset that there is a bigger bag of hot air in North America. That’s why Ann “Oats for Breakfast Lunch and Dinner” Coulter and President Agent-Orange-Julius-Caesar Dumpster-Fire-and-Fuhrer The-Mini-Peach-Putin Von Trumplestillskin’s houses are both in Irma’s path. … More Day 233

Day 234

Popping my head out of my underground bunker long enough to type this. Irma is hitting Florida’s hanging chad. Equifax got hacked and half of the United States Citizens have had their information put at risk. Hurricane Jose is following Irma like President Agent-Orange-Julius-Caesar Dumpster-Fire-and-Fuhrer The-Mini-Peach-Putin Von Trumplestillskin followed Crooked Hillary around the debate stage. … More Day 234

Day 235

President Agent-Orange-Julius-Caesar Dumpster-Fire-and-Fuhrer The-Mini-Peach-Putin Von Trumplestillskin will be overseeing his first 9/11 memorial today. Things I hope he doesn’t mention:  1. His victory.  2. The size of the crowd.  3. The media.  4. North Korea 5. The deal he made with the democrats. 6. The money he got for Trump Tower even though it wasn’t … More Day 235

Day 236

Anyone else feel like President Agent-Orange-Julius-Caesar Dumpster-Fire-and-Fuhrer The-Mini-Peach-Putin Von Trumplestillskin is hiding in an underground bunker? I haven’t seen his orange face for a few days, but maybe that’s because I’ve been busy. In light of not seeing him for a few days, I’m going to start a rumor that he had a stroke and … More Day 236

Day 237

President Agent-Orange-Julius-Caesar Dumpster-Fire-and-Fuhrer The-Mini-Peach-Putin Von Trumplestillskin’s administration finally got a win in the courts. They have stopped 24,000 sponsored immigrants from getting into the country. For those 24,000 people this is soul crushing news. It isn’t fair, it isn’t right, it is just plain cruel. Let me think, who was responsible for the last terrorist … More Day 237

Day 238

Steve #GrandmaGlasses #ISpentHighSchoolStuffedInALocker Mnuchin asked for a military jet to take him on his honeymoon. His ex-actress, ex-model wife #FaceBySurgeon #PantsByVersace wanted to fly to their honeymoon on the taxpayer’s dime. I think this is an excellent idea…all Americans should get private jets to fly to their honeymoons. Who cares about universal healthcare and free college tuition? I want my honeymoon … More Day 238

Day 239

President Agent-Orange-Julius-Caesar Dumpster-Fire-and-Fuhrer The-Mini-Peach-Putin Von Trumplestillskin spent yesterday contradicting himself. He kicked off the day by continuing the claim that both sides were to blame for the violence in Charlottesville. In a philosophical sense he is right. If a bunch of Nazi’s falls in a forest and no one is around, do they make a … More Day 239