Day 361

Least racist person you’ll ever interview and most racist person I know, President Fatboy Agent Orange Julius Caesar Salad Hair Lord Dampnut Dumpster Fire and Furher Von Trumplestillskin Von Trumpenstein Von Jenius passed his fitness test yesterday. What did we find out:

1. He is one pound away from being obese. (So…he’s obese.) 

2. He uses hair growth treatments. (He should be suing those guys.)

3. His heart rate and blood pressure are pretty good for a 71 year-old lunatic. (No conscious, no pressure.)

4. He passed a screening test for dementia. (Me too.)

5. He takes meds to control his cholesterol and it sounds like he needs to take more. (A lot more.)

6. He needs to exercise and change his diet. (Not happening. Sad. Loser.)

All of that just goes to show you that medical science has come a long way. Here’s the thing I want to focus on the mental screening test. This wasn’t an IQ test. This wasn’t a test to find out if he knows anything about anything. It was a test to find out if he can remember little things. He can remember little things. That doesn’t make him mentally fit, it just emphasizes the fact that when he does something crazy it is because he is crazy, not that he is slipping…he’s already slipped. 

Speaking of slippage, Sloppy Steve Bannon was let out of his cage yesterday so he could testify for the house investigative group. He went and said, “I can’t testify about anything, because the White House said I could invoke a special privilege called ‘I don’t want to talk.'” This made most of the committee angry, but too bad for them they are the ones empowering the Executive Wing to believe that it can do whatever it wants. 

The good news is that Mueller has Bannon slated to testify under oath too. I doubt Mr. Bannon will get to say, “I’m not feeling like saying anything today.” If he does, I’d bet he ends up in a nice jail cell until he wants to talk. 

I know it’s cruel and unusual, but if Bannon gets locked up, I vote that they don’t let him have a souvlaki either.

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