Day 327

Want to see how crazy the Trumplestillskin administration has been? Exhibit A: A few days ago, President Agent Orange Julius Caesar Salad Dumpster Fire and Fuhrer Von Trumplestillskin Lord Dampnut Von Trumpenstein tweeted that a US senator was willing to have sex with him for money. Yeah, that happened… and now… on with the greatest show/train-wreck on Earth. 

Net Neutrality will be decided today. Studies have shown that millions of comments on the net neutrality website have come from bots in support of killing equal access to the web. I’m pretty sure the businesses who will benefit from the end of net neutrality had nothing to do with it. Wink-wink. SKYNET NOW! 

My little cowboy friend, Roy “The Montgomery Mall Mauler” Moore is not conceding defeat to Doug “Vanilla Milkshake” Jones in Alabama. Moore is praying to God that the extra votes show up in the mail. God is like, “Thanks for running for office and outing yourself as a creep.” Roy Moore’s horse has been sent off to the horse whisperer for therapy. I think that horse deserves some extra oats because the people of Alabama probably watched Moore riding it and said, “That guy isn’t a cowboy. He’s a fake. I’ll vote for Nick Saben instead. Roll Tide.” 

Don-Fredo had a nine-hour grilling in front of the Senate investigators. If you include the house investigation, seven hours, that makes two full days of work for poor Don-Fredo. For a Trump, two full days of work mean he gets a month off and five rounds of golf on the American Taxpayer. I sure hope Don-Fredo used that great defense of “lawyer client” privilege. 

Omarosa has finally gotten her walking papers. She went out like the reality star that she is. Reports are that she had to be dragged out of the White House. She is already appearing on morning shows promising to tell all the behind-the-scenes dirt on the Trumpenstein administration. I hope publishing houses and Barbara Walters don’t fall all over themselves to get her story because her story isn’t worth paying for. 

What is worth paying for is a hot souvlaki on a cold day.

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