Day 324

Faux Newz is spending all its time calling for Santa Mueller to step down. This is how a propaganda machine works. The government wants something reported, it gets reported. The mega-phone of Faux Newz has been blasting lies into retirement homes, and angry white dudes’s ears for at least a decade. When you wonder how we are where we are, look at that stupid channel. 

At the same time, President Agent Orange Julius Caesar Salad Dumpster Fire and Fuhrer Von Trumplestillskin Lord Dampnut Von Trumpenstein is saying that news in the US is a “stain on America.” What country am I living in? This sounds more like 1980s USSR than USA 2017. Now, I’ll give Trumplestillskin this, he knows about stains… stains left by Russian prostitutes, stains left by missed bites of KFC on his long red ties, permanent stains on democracy left by devaluing the many honest people who work in government, and the stain that he is trying to leave on an already pretty stained state of Alabama, but the stain he is leaving is going to get sent to the cleaners soon. (Come On SANTA!) 

Roy “The Montgomery Maller” Moore has been keeping a low profile the past few days as the election to fill Jeffro Bowdeen Sessions vacated seat is Tuesday. Will the state of Alabama hold its nose and vote for the Mall-Rat with a background in getting himself kicked out of office? Or, will they finally decided they’ve seen enough and vote for a democrat? Those folks in Alabama may not even know there is an election. They’re more focused on the football playoff where the state can brag about being number one in something other than poverty, low test scores, incarceration rate, and people named Colonel. 

While all this is going on, the little elves in the house and senate are working away on how to cut taxes for the rich and make sure the poor get what is coming to them: a lump of coal to go with that promised coal job. 

Santa Mueller’s elves are working away too. The only lump of coal they have will be delivered to the White House. The sugar plums dancing in my head are accompanied by a jingle that goes, “Lock him up. Lock him up.” It’s a catchy tune, almost as addictive as souvlaki.

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