Day 301

200,000 gallons of oil are now soaking into the groundwater in South Dakota from a leak in the Keystone pipeline. I’m sure the EPA will get there and start fixing things … what’s that, there’s no EPA anymore. Yep, businesses always do what’s best so I’m sure the lack of oversight won’t hurt anyone. 

Speaking of things that you never thought would hurt anyone. Senator Al Franken is now calling for an investigation into himself. Ten years ago he thought it would be funny to take a picture of himself groping a woman while she slept while out on a USO tour. It wasn’t. He has apologized and admitted his act. I’m pretty sure this will be the focus of Faux Newz for the next two weeks. 

Santa Mueller has supenoed the Trumplestillskin campaign and seems to be closing in. Oh, I love to open my presents before Christmas. Please, Santa. Please put some handcuffs on a few Trumps. 

THE KUSH is in deep trouble. He had undisclosed email contacts with Wikileaks during 2016. This doesn’t look good for the boy who flew too close to the sun. I wonder how Santa Mueller is going to roll this out. I’m betting Mueller is trying to strategically work out the arrests verses pardons chess game right now. I say arrest the Orange dude first. Take away his hamburgers for a day and he’ll start talking. 

I know it might be considered torture, but maybe putting a souvlaki in front of him after not feeding him for two hours will get him to spill the beans.

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