President Agent Orange Julius Caesar Salad-Hair Fire and Fuhrer Von Trumpenstien has his big chance to show us all the art of the deal. His campaign spent one million American dollars in the last quarter on legal fees. Most of this is for the Russian defense, but some is probably defending the secret recipe of spray tan. (Rumor has it that it is made of finely blended orange juice, crushed shrimp shells, and Orangutan hair. Spray on, let sit for twenty minutes, and you’re good to go for 24 hours.) The Russian defense can be ended and Trumplestillskin can make 9 million in profit by simply turning all the Russian election fixing information over to Larry Flynt who is offering ten million dollars for information that will impeach Trumpenstein. This is a win, win, win, win. Larry wins. America wins. The world wins. Russia loses, which is a win. 

Come on, Mr. Art of the Deal! That’s nine million dollars looking your in your orange face, or, about three million souvlaki!