Day 249

THE KUSH has reappeared in the news. He is not being held hostage in the Middle East where he solved that whole 3,000-year-old war, he is not on an assassin’s mission to North Korea, he is not sending notes to Steve “Yoga Pants” Bannon that say, “Still here. Where you at?”. Nope, THE KUSH has reappeared because he was…wait for it…using an unsecured private email address. “Lock him up! Lock him up!” I’d fake moral outrage, but instead I’ll just ask for a six-month investigation into how this could happen to the smartest man in Washington. 

President Agent-Orange-Julius-Caesar Dumpster-Fire-and-Fuhrer The-Radish-Shaped-Ruler The-Mini-Peach-Putin Von Trumplestillskin has added seven more nations onto his travel ban. Here’s how I see this, if Trumplestillskin can point out the nation in question on a globe and name it, then he can ban travelers from there. That should limit the travel ban to Mexico, Canada, and Russia. (Maybe, maybe…the United States too.) 

The NFL protests are growing. People are really upset about this. I believe some people think the protest is about the respecting the flag or something like that…that’s a little like saying Rosa Parks was protesting the cleanliness of the bus system in Alabama, or Tommy Smith was protesting OJ Simpson’s arrest, or Donald Trump-roast was protesting good sense by becoming president. To clear things up for people, the protests are about the upcoming Billie Jean King movie. 

The GOP is pushing forward on death care/TrumplestillskinCare. They are currently bribing Alaska and Maine with extra dollars for their votes. Yep, that’s how democracy works. Toss a few bucks my way and I’ll support a bill was something Jefferson took out of the Constitution at the last minute. 

It’s Monday, we’ve survived almost 250 days…how much longer can this go on? 

Please, please, please, Mr. Mueller finish up your investigation and start putting people in jail. I know it is impossible to get tired of souvlaki, but come on, 250 days!

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