President Agent-Orange-Julius-Caesar Dumpster-Fire-and-Fuhrer The-Radish-Shaped-Ruler The-Mini-Peach-Putin Von Trumplestillskin wants to have a 4th of July military parade…like North Korea, China, Russia, and France. (Yeah, France likes to show off its big guns too. Seems a bit un-French but somebody has got to protect the price of a baguette.) Trumplestillskin is an infant. “I like the big guns. Give me the big guns.” Come on! If you really want to scare the world, have a parade of Confederacy supporters. It’d be like a casting call for Deliverance 2: Revenge of the South. The rest of the world would be like, “They are crazy. Don’t mess with them.”
The biggest news of the day is that Paul “Grab the Cannoli Leave the Gun” Manafort was wiretapped…for good reason. He seems to be the front man for all the Russian interference. Now, was he following orders, or was he doing this all on his own? The FBI raided his house, a storage locker, and raided Putin’s heart. I don’t know what they found, but Putin’s heart was an empty husk of dried beet leaves. Will Manafort talk? Will he roll over on The Radish Shaped Ruler? Will Don-Fredo get his allowance? Where is THE KUSH? Strange things are afoot at the San Dimas Circle K…and on the corner of Pennsylvania Ave and K Street.
Hillary “Not Liza Minelli In a Costume” Clinton said she would question the legitimacy of the election if The Mini Peach Putin is shown to be behind the Russian hacking of the election. Can we just hit pause for a moment? Sure, I don’t like waking up every morning and wondering, “What did he do now?” But I also don’t want to spend the next three years having to listen to Rush “The Blue Pill Makes You Larger and The White Pill Makes You Feel Smaller” Limbaugh chanting “lock her up” over the airwaves. Can we just get a cardboard cut-out of Lincoln and that can be our president for three years? I mean, really, after Trumpster-fire I’m convinced that a 16 oz glass of water from Lake Michigan could be our president.
What goes best with 16 oz of cool lake water? Souvlaki!
Why is my page titled South of the Strait? Well I live in a far corner of the United States. I live in a small town south of the Strait of Juan de Fuca. If I was going to throw a rock across the strait it would land in Canada. I used to be an English teacher. I have worked in Westport, Port Angeles, and Sequim, Washington... and I did two years of substitute teaching in Coalinga, California.
I've moved around a lot, living in: Sterling,Kansas; Chicago; Jordan, Montana; Lemoore, California; Auckland, New Zealand; Spokane, Washington; Gambier, Ohio.
What do I write? For WordPress I used to print once a week for general comments. I wrote reviews of music concerts my daughter made me attend. (Each month she would want us to drive to Seattle to see a music group. I usually stood in the back watching weird stuff.) I also wrote about trips I have taken in Europe where I liked getting lost. I also wrote during the few months when my son was treated for cancer. (He is officially free of cancer of five years.) About three years ago I decided to stop writing blogs so I could concentrate on writing a few books. I have completed three books...or maybe four. I have now compiled my short stories poems and memoirs on Amazon. You can get it at Amazon now..."A Work In Progress"--Jon Eekhoff. I have been very close to getting a printed book called "Lost Summer" but I was never offered $1,000,000.00. (It's set in Paris, 1920's, with baseball, writers, artist, and actually true stuff.) I wrote a book about college basketball called "Laidlaw." It's kind of a mix of "Moby Dick" and a coach who is about to get fired so he takes his team out for a free drive around the West. My most recent book is "California Tales." These are connected stories about the missionary churches in California. They are sad, funny, inspiring, and odd. I had the entire book done in my head and had just one section to finish the next day...and that is when I fell 20 feet from my roof and landed on the cement. (Like a lot of men, I thought I could maintain my own roof instead of leaving it to the professionals.) I don't remember anything about my accident but I am told I was flown to Harborview Medical Center in Seattle. Though conscious and responsive after surgery to remove part of my skull, I don't remember anything from my first month there. I spent another month of Harborview working on walking, speaking, and writing. That was two years ago. As a TBI (Traumatic Brain Injury) survivor, I could have quit writing, but I am not going to quit. I work with the University of Washington Speech and Hearing Clinic.
So, here I am. I am married and live here in Sequim with my wife Cheryl. Our kids live in nearby cities. Writing is now an exhausting exercise, but something I plan to keep working on.
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