A Year Of tRUMP

Day 217

Science Envoy, Daniel Kammen sent his letter of resignation to President Agent Orange Julius Caesar Trumpster-Fire and Fuhrer-The Mango Madman-Von Trumplestillskin yesterday. The letter had a secret code: Take the first letter of each paragraph and it will spell a word, IMPEACH. It would have been cooler if it spelled out WU TANG FOR LIFE, but for a scientist it’s a pretty solid effort. 

The military transgender twitter ban is apparently becoming a real thing. Trumplestillskin seems to be under the impression that overspending in the military can be curbed by preventing gender reassignment surgery. I’d bet Trump-roast spends more money on his fake tan and hairdo each year than the military spends on gender surgeries. If you want to cut military spending, you could create a time machine and go back and kill Dick Cheney. (Not advocating violence…maybe just an electronic jolt to the old pacemaker. Is that violent? I’m suggesting killing his pacemaker, his heart stopping would just be collateral damage.) 

The Charlottesville white supremacist who ranted on Vice News, Christopher “Part-Time Skinhead-Full-Time Douchebag” Cantwell, has turned himself in. Last I saw him he was crying about how the police might shoot him because he was armed. I wonder how scared he’d be if he realized that you don’t have to be armed to get shot in the US…you just need to be a person of color. (I support police, but I’m kinda anti shooting innocent people.)

WA Post has an article titled Three Speeches Three Trumps. This article details the three different speeches DJT (not DDT, but close) gave in the last week. I don’t think there are three Trumps, there is one Trump: A bag of angry orange pus. Sure, he can read and sound like Steven “Skynet Mistake” Miller but get him away from his precious teleprompter and he turns into who he is, a tottering old racist bag of gas. White House Chief of Staff, Machine Gun Kelly is doing his best to limit Trumplestillskin’s media diet, but it’s like trying to prevent grandpa from walking around the house in his underwear. You can get out in front of it most of the time, but you can’t be everywhere. 

The Wall is back. Not the Pink Floyd wall, but the one Trumpster-fire is going to build across the Mexican border. Remember when Mexico was going to pay for it? Well, not any longer. Now, Professor Art of the Deal is saying he is going to shut down the government if they don’t spend taxpayer money on building him an invisible, solar wall that is 30 feet tall. 

One would think that we could find a better way to spend my tax money, for example, it might be time to build a strategic souvlaki reserve.

Categories: A Year Of tRUMP

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