What a day. Sean Spicy Spicy Spicer took his podium of lies and headed back to his sandbox. I will miss the Spicemaster General. Let’s remember the good old days instead of dwelling on the negative. Sean Spicer was the best White House Press Secretary ever PERIOD! He told the most truths PERIOD!

Hangman Mueller is walking around 1600 Pennsylvania Ave. in a black hooded robe and carrying a scythe. Mueller has asked the WH staff to preserve all records related to Don-Fredo Jr. If I were Don-Fredo, I would not get in any boats near Lake Tahoe. Turns out the lawyer who Don Jr met with to talk about “adoption” worked for the KGB before. Adoption keeps coming up in discussions about Russia. Is Russian trying to adopt the USA? I’m not okay with a stepdad like Putin. My current country-dad is a total jerk, but at least he harmlessly watches tv all day and eats chocolate cake. 

My favorite racist gnome, Jeffro Bowdeen Sessions, forgot that he met with the Russian Ambassador before the election. Jeffro’s brain must not work that well. He has forgotten so many Russian meetings that I’m beginning to believe he has that disease that causes people to have face blindness. If the reports are true then Sessions has perjured himself. Time to buy a tiny gnome-like prison cell.

THE KUSH forgot 77 things to declare on his paperwork worth over 100 million dollars. (At least he doesn’t have 99 problems like Jay Z. THE KUSH might have a problem in the one area in which Jay Z has none.) How does someone who has a brain that cannot remember anything make a $100 million? THE KUSH needs to start watching prison movies to prepare himself for the next twenty years. Unless…President Agent Orange pardons him. 

The only crime I want a pardon from is souvlaki rage.